Brown-Eyed Girl

One of my recent tweets detailed my rule that once the band plays "Brown-Eyed Girl" at any function, I'm out the door.  In this case, said tweet was prompted at a charity event downtown over the weekend.  The band started out tolerably with "What A Wonderful World" and Bruce Springsteen's "Fire," but the third song killed out.  The charity already had our money, so I felt no remorse about calling it a night and heading home.  The band didn't even make the lead singers handle the tune - it was instead turned over to the pony-tailed keyboardist, who probably mastered the tune at a smooth lounge somewhere.  The song was too much of a chore for the regular singers - they had to call in backup.

It seemed to hit a nerve, too.  I got responses uniformly in support of my personal rule, so it made me wonder why the song is still played so frequently.  It's a song so bad, not even a bass solo could save it.  Van Morrison has infinitely better material, so why not go for that?  The only thing I can come up with is:

1. Instantly recognizable.
2. Drilled into your head.
3. Easily identifiable with the majority of the population.
4. Fast enough to dance to, slow enough to not present a challenge.
5. Some kind of brainwashing and desensitization at birth.  Probably involving needles.

I'm going to stop thinking about it now.  Sorry for the burden. Just stop playing it, please.  That's all I ask.